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Writer's pictureFiona

Advanced care planning: from a carer's perspective



Wendy, carer for her mum with dementia and other long-term health conditions, has had things very tough, especially throughout the last year. She has been dealing with her mum’s decline in health and hospital admissions, alongside her own health issues, as well as the pressures of being a 24/7 carer while trying to hold down a full-time job.




Here is part of that story:


“My mum went into hospital just before Christmas 2022. The week before this we had received a phone call from my mum’s surgery about signing a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate). Mum and I discussed this and had informed the surgery we were considering it; they said they would come back to us in the New Year.
Whilst in hospital Mum’s pulse rate dropped very low and the crash team were called in case she had a cardiac arrest.  It was later discovered that she had been given a new medication that had caused this potentially fatal reaction.  Her medication was changed and eventually she came out of hospital.
I am so glad I hadn’t signed the DNR as I don’t think the crash team would have been called and my mum might not have been here today, bossing me around and still enjoying trips to the park when she feels up to it....I do worry about myself. I have no children. It does make me wonder what will happen to me in my old age. Will what happens depend on money? Or on someone’s decision on whether they want me around?”

Our hearts go out to Wendy and all of you in similar situations. If anyone wanted to read the full version of Wendy’s story please let us know as she has agreed that carers can read the full version.


If you are worried about anything you have read here in Wendy’s story, here’s a link to information about advance decisions in care planning so you can stay informed:


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